One Year Later

365 days ago, in a span of 19 days, my life was changed.

I remember opening all my presents, stuffing myself full with ham and potatoes, and enjoying board games and basketball with my family. I tried to sleep that night, but 3:00 am came early, and the anticipation was far too great.

I remember boarding the first plane, comparatively a short flight to Washington D.C. We would eventually travel through Belgium and Rwanda before finally reaching our destination: Uganda.

I remember the smell. It was like a slap in the face as soon as I stepped out of the plane. The heat engulfed me. The air was thick. The bugs were everywhere. It was a world completely unknown and so very different than my home. As we walked out of the airport to meet Pastor Hudson, our host, a huge crowd of locals began to stare at us "muzungu", or "white people". We were obviously strangers in a strange land.

I remember being overwhelmed with emotion. Excitement. Fear. Joy. I was in a land I had only dreamed of visiting with my husband, best friend, dad, and brother. I had no idea how much I would change in just those few days on a foreign continent.

I remember the way the orphans were in awe of how light my skin was compared to theirs, the way they clung to my neck, hungry for affection, the way they sang their songs with dance and energy...

I remember the way the church members were so hungry for knowledge of the God they had recently come to know, how they danced with the movement of their tribes, their genuine gratefulness for our visit...

I remember the Muslims who approached me, asking why I believed in Jesus and not Allah, asking how they could come to know a God who truly cared about them and not just what they could do for Him, and invited us into their home where they had prepared the most delicious African food.

Between the miserable heat, the cockroaches, the lack of Western toilets, the frequent power outages, no pizza, and incredibly long flights, there was a lot that could have ruined my trip. But God used it to completely alter my heart and my perspective. I realized how happy the people are with so little, and how shallow and discontent I can be with so much. I realized how big the world truly is, though I can get very focused on just America as the crux of the earth. I realized how big God is, and how incredible His love is. I learned joy through the children, love through the adults, and brokenness from the orphans. I learned gratefulness.

The greatest thing it did was create in me a burning desire to do something, to be a world changer. And it doesn't have to just be in Uganda, but anywhere I am. I have a new love for people and for my God.

My heart misses Uganda. Its an ache that will not go away. It is my second home, and I place I know I will return to one day. It is the home of at least one of my future children, and a place I am forever grateful to because I am not the same.

Change

I don't do well with change.
I am finding I am not alone in this struggle. 
I have also learned how much of a control freak I am. 
I like things planned, organized, and understood.
I like them my way.

That's just how I am.

But it becomes exhausting.
Because this life is so unpredictable.
The unexpected is to be expected.
And that goes against every fiber of my being.

There are so many Scriptures about trusting God. 
Psalm 33:4 says, "For the Word of the Lord holds true, and we can trust everything He does."

So, then, why is it so darn hard for me?
Why can't I just accept that I am not in control and He is?

Incidents like 9/11, Hurricane Sandy, and the Sandy Hook shootings just add to my feelings of being out of control and helpless. 

Someone tell me they understand. Someone tell me I am not crazy. Someone tell me they fear and struggle like I fear and struggle. 

Someone tell me I am not alone in this.

United in Grief

I haven't turned on the news since December 14.
I refuse.
But, see, I am lucky enough to have that option.
I have the luxury of closing my eyes and living my life without the constant reminder of the tragedy that took place on the opposite coast.

No words I could come up with and nothing I could say could ever help. It could never make anything make sense.

At first we were united in grief. We as Americans and as human beings felt a collective, gut-wrenching sadness and an intense anger for the unimaginable. And then the arguing began as panic swept the nation. Giving guns to teachers? Metal detectors? Taking guns away? Is it God's punishment?

To me, these are things that need to be worked out. I have my opinions about them. But right now, I don't think this is the time to discuss them. Right now, our focus needs to be elsewhere. Our focus needs to be on these beautiful babies and heroes who lost their lives for absolutely no reason. There are families who will spend Christmas, birthdays, and the rest of their lives without their babies, moms, sisters, daughters, sons, brothers, nephews, cousins, friends... Now, more than ever, they need our prayers. They need us to be united as a country for them.

R.I.P.

A Message From Mr. Stein

He Apparently the White House referred to Christmas Trees as “Holiday Trees” for the first time this year which prompted CBS presenter, Ben Stein, to present this piece which I would like to share with you. He says it so much better than I can, so I will let him do that talking.

The following was written by Ben Stein and recited by him on CBS Sunday Morning Commentary:

My confession:

I am a Jew, and every single one of my ancestors was Jewish. And it does not bother me even a little bit when people call those beautiful lit up, bejewelled trees, Christmas trees. I don't feel threatened. I don't feel discriminated against. That's what they are, Christmas trees.

It doesn't bother me a bit when people say, “Merry Christmas” to me. I don't think they are slighting me or getting ready to put me in a ghetto. In fact, I kind of like it. It shows that we are all brothers and sisters celebrating this happy time of year. It doesn't bother me at all that there is a manger scene on display at a key intersection near my beach house in Malibu. If people want a crib, it's just as fine with me as is the Menorah a few hundred yards away.

I don't like getting pushed around for being a Jew, and I don't think Christians like getting pushed around for being Christians. I think people who believe in God are sick and tired of getting pushed around, period. I have no idea where the concept came from, that America is an explicitly atheist country. I can't find it in the Constitution and I don't like it being shoved down my throat.

Or maybe I can put it another way: where did the idea come from that we should worship celebrities and we aren't allowed to worship God? I guess that's a sign that I'm getting old, too. But there are a lot of us who are wondering where these celebrities came from and where the America we knew went to.

In light of the many jokes we send to one another for a laugh, this is a little different: This is not intended to be a joke; it's not funny, it's intended to get you thinking.

Billy Graham's daughter was interviewed on the Early Show and Jane Clayson asked her: “How could God let something like this happen?” (regarding Hurricane Katrina). Anne Graham gave an extremely profound and insightful response. She said: “I believe God is deeply saddened by this, just as we are, but for years we've been telling God to get out of our schools, to get out of our government and to get out of our lives. And being the gentleman He is, I believe He has calmly backed out. How can we expect God to give us His blessing and His protection if we demand He leave us alone?”

In light of recent events... terrorists attack, school shootings, etc. I think it started when Madeleine Murray O'Hare (she was murdered, her body found a few years ago) complained she didn't want prayer in our schools, and we said OK. Then someone said you better not read the Bible in school. The Bible says thou shalt not kill, thou shalt not steal, and love your neighbour as yourself. And we said OK.

Then Dr. Benjamin Spock said we shouldn't spank our children when they misbehave, because their little personalities would be warped and we might damage their self-esteem (Dr. Spock's son committed suicide). We said an expert should know what he's talking about. And we said okay.

Now we're asking ourselves why our children have no conscience, why they don't know right from wrong, and why it doesn't bother them to kill strangers, their classmates, and themselves.

Probably, if we think about it long and hard enough, we can figure it out. I think it has a great deal to do with 'WE REAP WHAT WE SOW.'

Funny how simple it is for people to trash God and then wonder why the world's going to hell. Funny how we believe what the newspapers say, but question what the Bible says. Funny how you can send 'jokes' through e-mail and they spread like wildfire, but when you start sending messages regarding the Lord, people think twice about sharing. Funny how lewd, crude, vulgar and obscene articles pass freely through cyberspace, but public discussion of God is suppressed in the school and workplace.

Are you laughing yet?

Funny how when you forward this message, you will not send it to many on your address list because you're not sure what they believe, or what they will think of you for sending it.

Funny how we can be more worried about what other people think of us than what God thinks of us.

Pass it on if you think it has merit.

If not, then just discard it.... no one will know you did. But if you discard this thought process, don't sit back and complain about what bad shape the world is in.

My Best Regards, Honestly and respectfully,

Ben Stein

 

 

Grato

Thanksgiving was a bittersweet holiday for me this year.

My family is amazing. I am so blessed to have a family who loves God, enjoys being together, and loves one another. We play games, eat enough food to feed a small army, and laugh until our sides hurt.

Growing up, this is how I thought most people spent Thanksgiving. This is what families did, and everyone had a family, so this is normal. As I grew up, I realized this is not the case. Most families are not this way and not everyone has a family.

For some reason, this was on my heart specifically this year. I felt so blessed to be in a room full of people who God gave me and loved me and I felt very thankful. But I felt very sad. I realized how many kids, teenagers, adults, elderly were spending it alone or in the midst of brokenness. I thought of the widows, the parents, the children, the siblings who had to spend their first holiday without their loved one.

And so I sent a prayer up to my God and I told Him thank You. Thank You for my life, thank You for my family, thank You for everything. And then I prayed for those who were hurting on this day. I prayed for those who were broken, sad, lonely.

I learned a lot about being thankful

...Or, as the Italians say it, grato...

I do hope your Thanksgiving was as wonderful as mine.

Game

It is only a game.
It is only a ball.
It is only a sport.

But it is more.

It builds character.
It creates friendships.
It nurtures the body.
It is common ground.
It provides hope.

It is a part of me.

From a young age, my love began.
And it has only grown as time has gone on.
It has connected a father and a daughter, a sister and a sister, a cousin and a cousin.
It has given me a passion.
It has made me deeply happy.

And now I go from player to player/coach.
And I am truly happy.

The Great Tragedy of the Election 2012

I found this blog that a friend posted on Facebook and it was written so well that I felt I should share it instead of try and rewrite it with my lack of skills. So here it is, from author Garrett Kell:

The Great Tragedy of the 2012 Election

There was a great tragedy that occurred on Tuesday, November 6, 2012.

The tragedy was not found in the celebrations of elected officials or the concessions of defeat. It was not colored red or blue, and it wasn’t wrapped up in useless campaign promises.
The tragedy of the 2012 election is that in this land of the free and home of the brave, many people were not allowed to vote. Their voices were silenced. Their votes were not cast. Their opinions not expressed. Why?

Because they were dead.

The great tragedy of the 2012 election is that roughly 33 million would-be voters were not with us, because they had been murdered. From 1973-1994 roughly 35 million babies were aborted. That’s roughly 35 million 18-39 year-olds who did not vote because they were dead.

That is an unspeakable tragedy.

They did not have the chance to explain to their children about what makes our nation so great. They did not have the chance to watch the results come in with their friends and family.

They did not have the chance to rest their heads on a pillow in the land of the free. That is a great tragedy.

But this story of tragedy is not over.

In 2016, roughly 5 million more voices will be unheard. Why? Because over 3,500 babies will be killed today. And each day leading up to Tuesday November 8^th, 2016. In the 3 minutes it takes you to read this post, 7 babies will have been aborted in the United States of America. Their voices are silenced. Their freedom not experienced. Their opportunity to be brave not known. Their lives taken from them.

This is a tragedy that hits close to home for me. When I was 19 years old, I chose to end the life of my first child through an abortion. My friend and I were in a scary place, we didn’t plan to get married, and we had nowhere else to go. So we chose to end the life of our child.

That child would be 16 today. They’d be excited about driving a car and in just a couple years, they’d be excited about voting. But, they won’t be doing any of that. I won’t be sitting down with them and explaining how to think about policies and the candidates that represent them. I won’t be able to tell them about freedom and justice for all. I took that freedom away with my injustice.

I cannot undo what I’ve done in the past. None of us can. Only Jesus, who shed His blood for sinners like me can heal those wounds. Jesus gives us great hope in the midst of this tragedy, and all the other tragedies we face in this life.

If you have committed an abortion, I want you to know that there is a refuge in Jesus. He will heal your wounds. There is no sin so great that He cannot forgive and no sin so small that does not need to be forgiven. If you will confess your sins and turn to Him in faith, He will wash away all your guilt and all your shame. Come to Christ.

If you support abortion, I encourage you to spend time in prayer and ask God to show you if abortion is something that pleases Him or not. Ask a Christian to help you see what God’s Word says about this. I’m under no assumption that you don’t already have deeply rooted ideas, I did too. I encourage you to take the time to read what God says about life and who has the right to give and take it away. I encourage you to start with Psalm 139.

If you are a Christian, be patient with those who view things differently than you. But don’t just be patient, speak truth in love to those who are in need. Find ways to help those who are struggling through unplanned pregnancies. Investigate options for adoption and invest in the lives of those who are facing difficult choices.

I have on my wall a picture of a 3 year old boy in cowboy boots. He’s a 3 year old boy who nearly wasn’t with us today because of the difficult place his mother found herself in. She was not married and pregnant and scared. But my wife met with her and prayed with her and took her to a Christian doctor who showed her the baby in her womb through a sonogram. That young mother had the courage to keep her child.

That young boy’s smile reminds me that God can save children, one at a time. But God does this by using His people to come alongside those who are struggling and lovingly showing them the Christ who can walk them through any terrifying situation, even an unplanned pregnancy.

I believe that the only hope to turn the trend of this tragedy around is for people to turn their hearts toward the God who made them through the way paved by His Son Jesus. Jesus changes hearts, and changed hearts changes a nation. May God give grace to us as a country, and may God give us courage to stand up in the midst of this tragedy so that, if the Lord tarries, there will be many more people casting votes in 2030. Lord Jesus, we need your help.
 

I Pledge

I pledge prayers for my President, Barack Obama.

I pledge prayers for my nation, the United States of America.

I pledge more effort towards seeing the people in my homeland come to know the loving and saving grace of Christ Jesus.

I pledge less of me and more of Him.

Today, I pledge these things, put my hope in my God, and pray that He heals my land.

Today is it.

Today is the day. Today, America's future is decided. This election is seen as one of the most important elections ever, and one of the closest as well. My facebook has been a place for much discussion and debate. And I am ok with that, because although I do not enjoy politics, I understand their importance.

As Christians, we have not done our job in voting. Our not voting is a vote and we have let it get out of hand. We have a responsibility to God first, America second, our loved ones third, and ourselves fourth to vote. And to vote Biblically.

Both candidates are human. Both are not perfect. But we have to vote who is closest to Scripture. I stole this from my friend, Sarah, but this is 100% true for me:

I voted for the most pro-life candidate, because God hates the shedding of innocent blood (Proverbs 6:17).

I voted for the most pro-Israel candidate, because God blesses those who bless Israel and curses those who don't (Genesis 12:3).

I voted for the most pro-debt reduction candidate, because the borrower is servant to the lender (Proverbs 22:7).

I voted for the most pro-marriage candidate, because God is for marriage as defined in Genesis 2:24.

I voted based as closely as I can on God's Word (2 Timothy 3:16)

[SIDENOTE: Simply the right to vote is a privilege. My travels in the few third world countries I have been to has proven to me that the fact I get to vote without paying someone, fighting for it, dying for it, or not having the option at all is something that most of the world cannot say. Today, I am grateful I get to vote.]

As today plays out and (hopefully) you vote, join me in praying for our nation. God already knows who will be the next POTUS and He is the one who places them there.

"He controls the course of world events; He removes kings and sets up other kings. He gives wisdom to the wise and knowledge to the scholars." -Daniel 2:21

"Pray this way for kings and all who are in authority so that we can live peaceful and quiet lives marked by godliness and dignity." -1 Timothy 2:2

"Happy is the land whose king is a noble leader..." -Ecclesiastes 10:17a


"When there is moral rot within a nation, its government topples easily. But wise and knowledgeable leaders bring stability." -Proverbs 28:2

Ok, ok I am done. Well almost.. I will end with this statement and one last verse. It is hard for me to trust God, but we must. We must do our part and then trust Him. 

"Everyone must submit to governing authorities. For all authority comes from God, and those in positions of authority have been placed there by God." -Romans 13:1

God Bless America.

More than a Politician.... a Soul.

If you haven't heard about the President, Governor Romney, the debates, and all the other glorious things that comes from election time, you are most likely living under a rock. We are bombarded with commercials, tweets, posts on Facebook, and even a debate or two of our own. As a Christian, I tend to forget that these two candidates are human beings who have a God that desperately loves them and sent His only Son to be brutally murdered and hung on a tree for their souls. I tend to complain about how Obama has destroyed our country and I forget that I am no better. I sin like he does, and God forgives me and loves me just like Barack. I complain so much and I pray so little.

All that to say that I stumbled across a blog today that put it in better words than I can. Check this out:

Last night there was a debate.
I was at rehearsal so all I was able to see was my twitter feed and not the debate.
As I was scrolling the feed I was laughing at all my witty friends and their banter.
So I went home and watched the debate.
I thought my guy won.
I was proud.
I had plenty of thoughts.
I learned a bit more about the other guy.
But then I had to go to the bathroom.
So I paused it.
I came back to the sofa and sat down and this was the screen that it was paused on…



It was almost haunting as I stared at the screen.
These 2 men have souls.
They are created by God almighty.
They are loved deeply by a God who does not degrade either of them.
They are 2 men who have wives and kids who cry at night seeing the stress and weight they are under.
They are 2 men who at the end of the next 20 days will still be 2 men who God loves deeper than we can even fathom.
For 15 seconds I stared at a screen where I was looking at the humanity in them.
And I had a thought.
We did it before. We can do it again. We are going to Pray… Backwards…
What do I mean by that?


We are going to turn off the news, open our Bibles, and pray for our leaders.

WE WILL PRAY NONPARTISAN
1. Pray that our leaders would grown in Faith. In their relationships with Jesus Christ.
2. Pray for their marriages.
3. Pray for their children.
4. Pray for those around them.
5. Pray for their emotional and physical health.
6. Those on the left will pray blessing on Romney, those on the right will pray blessings on Obama.


http://www.ragamuffinsoul.com/2012/10/prayingbackwards2012/

Whitney

Sometimes there are things that happen where words cannot even begin to express the situation or emotion at all. Over the last 4 days, this type of situation has been happening 30 minutes from my home. Whitney Heichel was a 21-year old-girl who disappeared a few days ago in Gresham. It was a normal day, she was on her way to work at Starbucks. It quickly turned into the most abnormal day her or her family will ever have. A 24-year-old man who lived in her apartment complex waited until she went to work and kidnapped her.

It just blows my mind every time I think about it. As the Gresham mayor put it, "Whitney represented our mothers, sisters, wives, daughters, friends, and loved ones." This could have been anyone... Me, my sisters, my mother, my cousin, my friends... Anyone.

My heart breaks for her... So young, so innocent. And even more, my heart breaks for her family... Her husband. The thought of losing my spouse or my family this way, or at all, is gut-wrenching. Though I did not know her and will most likely never meet her family, I will never forget her.

It was a reminder that life is short.
It was a reminder that anything can happen.
It was a reminder that this world is evil.
It was a reminder that there is no time to be mad or to fight, but only to love.

R.I.P. Whitney Heichel

Pinterest Pumpkin

I am an Oregonian through and through. We had somewhat of an Indian summer here in the Pacific Northwest.... Summer barely lasts from July-August and this year, we were into the beginning of October with temperatures still in the high 70's. Some people loved it, and I did for a time, but then my Oregonian kicked in and I longed for rain and clouds. Part of it too is that my favorite time of year is fall. I love it. I love the colors, the pumpkin cookies, the hot chocolate, the leaves, Thanksgiving, sweaters, rain, boots....

You get the idea.

Anyways, Pinterest seems to love autumn too. So I spent some of my free time (who I am kidding? I have no free time... I definitely should've been doing homework...) looking up DIY decoration ideas cause we are broke but I love me some fall decor.

I found this cute idea and thought I could do it myself. And it turned out pretty good!

First, I got this tacky, plastic, orange pumpkin from Wal-Mart for dirt cheap. I had some spray paint from another project and some thumbtacks from my office.

I then spray painted it black and waited for it to dry. This was the longest part.. The rest took me literally 7 minutes.

Here is what I came up with:

Not bad, huh? It was hard to get the "D" to actually look like a D...

I found another project I am going to do so I will keep you posted.

Lyons

Wow. It has been a LONG time since I have blogged. I really did have intentions of blogging more, but life has been a bit crazy. I know everyone says that, but seriously.

Since my last blog, my husband and I are no longer youth pastors in Lyons. My parents were the senior pastors there and we were the youth pastors. Sometimes family crisis and family issues happen. Sometimes family has to come before ministry and the church. This was one of those times. And so, we are taking a break. Yesterday we went to a new church in Salem. It was weird, just going to church and not doing anything or being in charge of anything. It was a bittersweet thing. It was both a relief and depressing.

Over the weekend, we had our annual statewide convention with many of the students in Oregon. I kept myself busy with helping behind the scenes to distract my mind from being reminded that I didn't bring any kids this year. But when it became time that everything that needed to be done was done and I sat back and watched other youth pastors pray with their students and advice their teens, I became sad. It was a bit selfish, I know, but hear me out. I am so glad that students came and that other pastors were able to be there for them. I just wish I was too.

Out of all of this, I miss the people the most, especially my students. I miss Sunday night youth groups, I miss events, I miss Sunday mornings, I miss Charlie's handshake every morning, I miss giving Gideon a hard time, I miss getting hit with a dodgeball, I miss dreaming big with Glenda... I miss my church.

But out of all of this, we are already a more united family. Out of all of this, my marriage is already stronger. Out of all of this, I believe I will be a better youth pastor. God has a reputation of taking the worst and making it the best. And I am trusting Him to do just that.

Pinned

I ACTUALLY MADE SOMETHING I PINNED!

I had some free time that is very much a rarity the other night, so I decided to make one of the thousands of things I have pinned on Pinterest. (P.S. You can follow me on Pinterest by clicking that little button down to the right) 

Some of them you have to buy stuff for, but it was like midnight, so I found one that I had all the supplies for already. These jeans are old and as you can see got a whole in the leg, so they were no longer wearable. 

 So, I cut them to shorts size, cut a couple slits in them, and took my cheese grater to them to rough them up a bit.

 Then I busted out the bleach, dropped it where I wanted it and let it show up. Next, I got the hydrogen peroxide out and dunked some cotton balls in it and dabbed it on the bleached spots to stop the bleach from spreading more and stop it from getting brighter. I through them into the washer and dryer and here is how they turned out! I haven't tried them on just yet, but not bad for a free pair of shorts!

The Rock that is Higher Than I

Nothing teaches you trust more than when trust is all you have.
When there are no other options but to rely on the One who will never fail.

Unfortunately for me, I learn the hard way.
So I learn trust the hard way.
It takes things getting to a point where trust is my only option that I learn to trust.

I am overwhelmed.
I am exhausted.
I am not in control.

Today, my trust must be in Him. Because my own strength has only failed me.

Patriotic

I didn't post on September 11th, because quite honestly I have no words for that day. Nothing seems worthy enough to be said about it. Nothing I came up with is good enough.

But then yesterday and today, the American Embassies in a few countries were attacked. Americans lost their lives. And the elections are coming up soon..

But I feel like it has become hard to be patriotic. Part of me is fearful of being an American. Part of me is breaking for my fellow Americans. And part of me is wishing that we as a nation were united again and patriotism was a lot more common. I wish the 4th of July was something that rallied us. I wish that more people loved being American.

Don't get me wrong... I would not want to be born anywhere else. when people ask me "what I am" I don't think back to being Welsh or Norwegian or Spanish.. I am an American. And I am proud of it. I just feel like  we have lost our unity, our being patriotic. I miss that. I miss that part of being American.

His Girlfriend

When my husband goes to work all day, I miss him.

When he leaves for work, I make sure I take the time to kiss him goodbye.

At night, we talk before we go to sleep.

I share every part of my day with him.

We try to have some kind of date time every week, even if that means a blizzard at Dairy Queen.

He tells me he loves me... all day every day.

We plan youth group together, pray together, talk about God together.

If something bothers me, I tell him right away so it doesn't get worse.

He finds ways to surprise me to remind me he loves me.

He sends me cute, cheesy text messages when we aren't together.

I know we haven't been married that long, but I hope that in 5 years, 10 years, 50 years, we will still be crazy in love.

Though I am his wife, I want to be his girlfriend too, until the day we die.

Morning

I am not a morning person in any way shape or form.. Unless you count going to bed around 2:00 in the morning being a morning person. I think the best and am the most productive around 11:00 pm. Weird? Yeah.

But this morning, my husband had to be at work by 6:00 and the poor guy didn't get up until 5:54. Luckily I woke up and woke him. In all the rush to find his work shoes and get out the door on time, I was wide awake. So I decided to get up and make some coffee and oatmeal and actually see a sunrise.

There is something about the morning I think I have been missing out on. The sunrise quietly slides up into the sky not asking for attention, but just greeting me softly. I made breakfast without speaking to anyone and enjoyed my food slowly. There was no rush, no deadline, no time. I am sitting here on the couch wrapped in a blanket, enjoying the quiet.

I am not saying that I am going to become a morning person, but I think there is something to be said about the stillness, the peace, the silence that accompanies getting up earlier to remind us that life doesn't have to be all so fast paced.

It is so nice to just breathe.

Make Him Look Bad

I have many pet peeves. Toilet paper on backwards, people reading over my shoulder, people who pull out in front of me and drive 20 miles under the speed limit, and watching commercials (I am spoiled by my DVR)... 

But nothing bugs me more than people who make me as a Christian and Jesus look bad. 

Nothing.

These people do a pretty good job of making us look bad.

But so does this guy:

If you don't recognize him, his name is Pat Robertson. He is a "pastor" (which by the way, now that we share this title offends me even more). He is also on the 700 Club on TV. And he says a lot of dumb things.... A LOT. For instance, when Haiti was devastated by a hurricane, he proceeded to tell America that it was Haiti's fault because of their "pact with the devil". He also likes to predict when the end of the world is going to come, in which case, he obviously has not been right. 

Once again, Pat Robertson opened his mouth and stuck his foot in it. Watch this clip:

Ok, Pat, let me get this straight... We should send money to orphans, but not really do anything else to love on them or help them. Also, sarcasm is a way to go... "No one wants to deal with the United Nations"?? Racist much? I'll give you this, sir, it is true that adoption isn't for everyone... I definitely think that it is only for some people. But what I don't agree with is saying that orphans grow up "weird". They are God's children just as much as biological children are. Just because they have parents does not mean they are less. God never asked us to throw money at those who need it. He said to love them. To care for them. 

James 1:27 "Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress..." 

Obviously, Pat Robertson isn't changing anytime soon, though I pray that he does... But to the people who think this man is speaking for us Christians, please do not be fooled. This man is a heretical, lost, ignorant man who does not deserve to be called "pastor". 

We Will Run

Thus far in 2012, God and I have had an interesting relationship. It can be summed up in these words: Doubt. Fear. Anger. Depression. Love. Overwhelmed. Passion. Intensity. Stubborness. Pride. Broken. Forgiven. New. Life.

I am planning on writing it all out when my brain can fathom it a little better. But for now, a song that has become so very personal to me. Enjoy.

We Will Run (by Gungor)

Create in me a clean heart
For I have turned my face from You
Teach us of Your ways O God O God
For we have turned away from You
Lord have mercy

We will run to You we will run to You
Turning from our sin we return to You
Father heal Your world make all things new
Make all things new

Your love and mercy build us shape us
Break us and recreate us now
Lord have mercy

20 Things

I found this on pinterest and I had to share. I adore it. Enjoy.

20 Things I Would Like to Tell Engaged or Newlywed Women

 1. Marriage is made up of two good forgivers. Because every marriage is made up of two sinners. (Romans 3:23)

2. At some point, you will have to learn that life isn’t all about you. (Philippians 2:3)

3. Don’t listen to women that tell you that passion fades…it doesn’t have to! (um…all of Song of Solomon)

4. Don’t give up. Love never fails. (1 Cor. 13)

5. He wants a kind wife, not a maid or another mother. Be nice. (Galatians 5:22-23)

6. Give your husband the gift of your respect.  He needs it more than you know. (Ephesians 5:33)

7. Be mindful of your expectations.

8. Honor the Lord above all things. Colossians 3: 17

9. Find your worth and security in the Lord, and don’t look to your husband to meet all of your needs.

10. Be very careful about reading romance novels, they set you up for an unrealistic view of romance.

11. Real romance is finding that one spot in the crook of his arm to snuggle into, that shared look over the dinner table when the kids are acting crazy, and the way he fixes the leaky sink when he is dog-tired after work.

12. Love is about relationship.  The more I love my husband, and seek a relationship with him, the less critical and duty-bound I become.  It is similar to my relationship with God.

13. Be thankful for the husband you have. Accept him as he is, not for what you want him to be.

14. Don’t compare!! Don’t buy into the game of comparing him with anyone else’s husband.

15.The Biblically “normal” marriage is filled with joy, connection, laughter, and peace. It’s not free of hurt feelings and conflict, but they know how to process their pain with one another so that they live more often in a meadow than at the scene of a train wreck.  This is not the average marriage, but it normal – -because it is a visible display of Jesus’ relationship with His bride (Ephesians 5:22-33).

16. Your marriage is a testimony! “The #1 evangelistic tool in America (the world) today is a successful marriage, because it’s a living miracle!” – Dr. Joe Aldrich, former president of Multnomah Bible College.

17. Pray for your marriage. Pray hard.

18.I’ve heard that is gets better with age.  I have to say in my short {13 year} experience, that is so true.

19. Where there is God, there is always hope. Even for the most broken marriages. “With God all things are possible.” (Matthew 19:26)

20.Marriage is commitment and sacrifice. But it’s also the best, most wild ride you will ever have with your best friend.